


You, Me, and the Easter Bunny

by TaleasOldasTimeandSpace



Series: Yet Another Gratuitously Fluffy Darcyland Soulmate AU [4]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Crack, Darcyland, Easter Bunny, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, SHIP DARCY WITH ALL THE THINGS, ShieldShock - Freeform, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, darcy gets kidnapped by hydra trope
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-27
Updated: 2016-07-27
Packaged: 2018-07-27 01:01:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 902
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7597213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TaleasOldasTimeandSpace/pseuds/TaleasOldasTimeandSpace
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As often as Darcy gets kidnapped by Hydra, she's starting to feel like Roxanne in Megamind.  Good thing she has the Easter Bunny to keep her company.  And her soulmate's waaay better than Metro Man.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You, Me, and the Easter Bunny

**Author's Note:**

> For [OvereducatedAndOverworked](http://archiveofourown.org/users/OvereducatedAndOverworked) who provided Darcy's (slightly modified) Words.

She was used to it at this point.

Getting kidnapped by Hydra or the villain of the month was old hat for Darcy.  She wasn’t sure why they bothered—they never got anything useful from the deal, just another base razed to the ground by Avengers on a rescue mission.  Sometimes she wondered if Fury had somebody on the inside orchestrating her kidnappings for the sole purpose of locating and destroying Hydra bases.  She wouldn’t put it past the sneaky pirate.

Honestly, it was almost  _boring._  She completely understood how Roxanne felt at the beginning of Megamind _._  Same old, same old, twice a month, like clockwork.

At least they’d given her the good stuff this time.  Whatever it was made the colours bright and wibbly, like she was underwater.  Plus, the Easter Bunny had materialized shortly after the drugs hit her system and kept her company while she waited for her rescue.  The Easter Bunny had a wicked sense of humour and was quite entertaining for a figment of her imagination.  He sounded just like Hugh Jackman, too.

He was in the middle of telling her the latest gossip about the Tooth Fairy when the door to her cell burst open and Captain America strode in, looking very patriotic and muscly and determined.  She was just about to chirp a happy greeting—they’d never actually met, but what were formalities between rescuer and drugged-out rescuee?—when he walked straight through the Easter Bunny to her side and began undoing her restraints.  The Easter Bunny stared at her in shock, large, rainbow-coloured tears falling from his eyes like tiny Easter eggs.  She couldn’t blame him—who wanted to be walked through as if they weren’t even there?  Mouthing _sorry_ , she looked at Steve and scowled.  At least, she thought she was scowling.  She’d lost feeling in her face about an hour ago.

 _‘Dang it, Steve!’_ she said. _‘Now you’ve made the Easter Bunny cry!’_

His hands froze on the straps around her wrists, his eyes slowly rising to meet hers.  She jerked her chin to where the Easter Bunny was dabbing at his tears with a pocket handkerchief.  He glanced over his shoulder in the direction of the Easter Bunny, who waved, then returned his attention to Darcy.  As he went back to work on her restraints, he remarked, _‘Please give the Easter Bunny my sincere apologies.  But how about we continue this conversation when you’re sober?’_

She squinted at him.  Despite the way his face was squishing and stretching and his left eyeball kept trying to jump out of his head, he was pretty cute.  ‘You’re probably right.  But,’ she raised a finger to shake at him and was momentarily distracted by the fact that her hand was free now, ‘I blame you for the fact that my mother was convinced I was going to grow up to be a drunk.  Sober indeed!’  She poked him in the shoulder for emphasis but missed, overbalancing and crashing to the floor.  Or she would have, but he caught her around the waist and scooped her into his arms.

He laughed as her head flopped onto his shoulder.  ‘Well how do you think I felt, knowing I was going to grow up to make the Easter Bunny cry?’

As he carried her out of the room, the Easter Bunny blew her a kiss and gave her two thumbs up.  She patted Steve’s chest comfortingly.  ‘That’s okay, he forgives you.’

‘Oh good.  Does that mean I still get chocolate?’

She gave that serious consideration, which was difficult since everything seemed to be getting dimmer and her mind didn’t want to cooperate.  ‘Yeah,’ she finally decided.  ‘But only if you share.’  With a yawn, she closed her eyes and snuggled her head on his chest.  ‘M’gonna take a nap now.'

 

* * *

 

When Darcy woke up, everything seemed back to normal.  Well, aside from the fact that there was too much _light_.  She groaned and covered her eyes with an arm.  There was a soft chuckle, and somebody squeezed her hand.  She pouted.  ‘Jaaaaane!’ she whined.  ‘Turn off the sun.  It’s too bright!’

There was another laugh, and her hand was squeezed again.  ‘Jane’s not here.  And I could ask the Easter Bunny to hit the lights, but he’s not here either.  I’m afraid you’re stuck with me.’

She frowned, head swimming with images of the Easter Bunny and Captain America, all swirled together with psychedelic colours and the word SOULMATE in big neon letters.  She lowered her arm and cracked open an eye.  Steve Rogers sat in the chair next to her bed, holding her hand and drawing soft circles on the back of it with his thumb.  He looked a lot less patriotic than he did before, but a lot cuter too, so win.  Especially since all of his features were staying where they were supposed to on his face.  She blinked at him, and he smiled.  ‘Hi,’ he said.

‘Hi,’ she replied intelligently.

‘I’m glad you’re feeling better.  Whatever they gave you was strong, but Helen says it’s out of your system now.’

She waved her free hand in the air.  ‘Yay.’

‘You’ve been out of it for a couple of days, and you were held by Hydra for a day before we found you.  You must be hungry.’  He held up a large egg wrapped in brightly-coloured foil.  ‘Chocolate?’

She grinned.  ‘Only if we share.’

**Author's Note:**

> Chocolate eggs become their thing. Darcy meets Steve when he gets back from a mission with a little baggie of chocolate eggs, and he brings a bag of them with him on the bi-monthly Rescue Darcy from the Evil Clutches of Hydra raids. They split them on the quinjet home, unless Darcy's too high to appreciate them (IE, she starts throwing them at the back of Clint's head while he pilots the jet. It only took one near-crash to nip that habit in the bud). In that case they wait until she wakes up. Tony makes faces and calls them dorks, but Darcy maintains that he's just jealous because he doesn't get chocolate.
> 
> This is true.
> 
> Darcy once confronted Fury and asked if he was behind her frequent kidnappings. he didn't answer, just stole one of her chocolate eggs. She took that as conformation.
> 
> My first official prompt fic! Thanks again to OvereducatedAndOverworked for providing the Words. I hope it lives up to your expectations.
> 
> Have a prompt? Leave it in the comments, or drop by my tumblr and [shoot the breeze](https://taleasoldastime-andspace.tumblr.com/ask)


End file.
